I’m a bad best friend

February 16, 2008 at 7:44 pm | Posted in Friends, Life, sick | Comments Off on I’m a bad best friend

Dear Meggie,

I planned on going to your party tonight, I really did, but I got stuck late at work and Sean is here at home feeling quite under the weather. You were kind when I told you that I might not make it, you understood, I just wish I could’ve been there for you at your beautiful new home. I hope you will come sleep over this week as we’ve talked about as I miss you tremendously.


The party pooper

The procedure

January 17, 2008 at 9:23 pm | Posted in family, sick, Video | 6 Comments

This morning’s endoscopy was an acid trip. I don’t remember most of being in the hospital (and of course I was knocked out cold during the actual procedure), but what I do remember is pretty funny.

First off, the not so fun part. I was scared. So scared. It’s silly, really, how scared I was to be put under anesthesia. The camera down my throat thing excited me and I knew once it was all over, I’d be happy to have this rare opportunity to see the inside of my stomach.

Once Sean left for the waiting room and they wheeled me into that room, my heart rate shot up dangerously high to 153 BPM. The nurses and anesthesiologist seemed quite concerned; a normal heartbeat should be less than 100 beats per minute. Next I knew, I was awake and had been talking to my Love for quite some time without recollection.

After they put me out and performed the endoscopy, my morning became a fantastic acid trip. Once I woke up I couldn’t stop laughing and saying “THIS IS WONDERFUL!” to all of the nurses. One of them said that I was the happiest endoscopy patient she had ever had. But seriously, I felt like kissing everyone for giving me such a fun operation.

Upon waking up, I asked my small mustached Jewish doctor if I farted during the operation. This, to me, was something I really needed to know. He acted awkwardly, as if he had just peed himself on stage at some award show, and told me that no, you didn’t fart, you were a perfect and classy patient.

About the results: The good and bad news is that the pictures came back looking not so great. I don’t have an ulcer, but my esophagus and stomach are lined with patches of red blotches.  The doctor  suspects the medications I was given to treat my Lyme were the culprit. We’re not sure really what is causing the irritation, but at least I feel better knowing that I’m one step closer to finding out why my stomach is in a constant state of discomfort.  I’ll wait to hear more from the results of my two biopsies on Monday.

The best part of today followed the endoscopy. Sean stayed with me until my sister could arrive, and then we picked up my mother and the three of us girls spent the entire day together.

Throughout this whole thing, Sean has been taking great care of me. He wouldn’t even let me fold an afghan this morning. He told me that I told all of the nurses this morning how much I loved him at every opportunity I found. I don’t remember mentioning my love for Sean at all. I guess being in love will do that to a person.

I’m glad that I don’t have to be conscious to proclaim to complete strangers how lucky I am to have found my soul mate.

Christmas party pooper

December 20, 2007 at 2:53 pm | Posted in Employment, sick | 2 Comments

Today was our work Christmas/holiday party and also my first day back on the job in a week. We had a secret Santa gift exchange and happily, I drew my friend Shawn’s name.  EASY: he’s Irish, likes to drink on occasion, a dog-lover, happily married — he’s a lot like my Sean.

So I bought him Guinness pub glasses.

Maybe not work appropriate, but a present I knew he would like.

I wrapped Shawn’s present last night and went to sleep excited to go back to work and celebrate the holidays with my work friends and teammates.

This morning I woke up dry heaving, in severe stomach pain, coughing up spit and drained of energy.

It must be stress. I ran out of my ulcer medication three days ago. I’m a bum.

I took Sammy for two long walks before work and the cold air made my stomach feel a little better. I dropped him off at home and headed to work.

By noontime, we walked up to our team meeting/holiday party. I still felt sick but now I felt desperate for a garbage can or a toilet. I walked right into that meeting, stared at all of my coworkers, told my boss who was sitting at the head of the table that I needed to go home now. She looked at me and said, “are you sure you can’t stay for the party?” I nearly threw up on her as I told her no, I had to go.

Ironically, Shawn had picked my name for secret Santa too, so he handed me my present — a Dunkin Donuts gift card, candles, and a silver photo frame — and later text messaged me to feel better.

I walked away from that meeting with my tail between my legs, but I’m glad I didn’t throw up in the 3rd floor conference room.

The Mancold: Day 6

December 12, 2007 at 9:20 am | Posted in sick | Comments Off on The Mancold: Day 6

Here’s hoping I get my voice back before the end of my shift today.

Whistle while you work

December 7, 2007 at 9:29 pm | Posted in sick | 3 Comments

Management tries to keep us happy at work. Yesterday, we all received a homemade gingerbread cookie. They give us prizes, awards, and buttons.

Happy employees work harder, it’s proven.

But when you’ve got the makings of a bad cold, like I do, no amount of cheer makes our job easier. We talk on the phone for eight hours a day.

Sometimes this is a hard feat even without a cold.

My throat is scratchy and I’ve got a dry cough and — People, I just don’t want to talk to you today. Especially because it is snowing out and frigidly cold in this office.

Sean is at Universal Studios tonight. He says it is seventy degrees out and he is wearing short sleeves. He keeps sending me picture messages of all of the fun he is having:

And although I’m a little jealous that I am stuck in bed nursing my cold on a Friday night in a snowstorm while he is in the tropics riding coasters, it could be much worse:

…I could be on the phone.

Protected: Sanitizing

August 28, 2007 at 10:20 am | Posted in sick | Enter your password to view comments.

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Protected: It’s what you make it

August 9, 2007 at 9:15 pm | Posted in Employment, Happy, sick | Enter your password to view comments.

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Out damn spot

April 20, 2007 at 9:41 am | Posted in sick | 2 Comments

I despise sickness. As loves tend to do, Sean passed his marvelous cold over to me this week. I am enveloped in empathy for him because somehow last weekend, when he felt like I do now, he helped my sister and Laura move. Yesterday I drove to C.V.S and thought I might pass out from the lack of energy standing in a two-minute line takes out of you.

On Wednesday night, after I had helped Anthony paint his den all day, this sickness swarmed me and took over my body. I had been fighting it off all week with success, but on Wednesday night I could no longer breathe through my nose. It was one of those sickness that absolutely paralyzed me and I couldn’t find a single cup of strength to move my limbs.

This made for great entertainment. Sanjaya was about to get kicked off of the show and I couldn’t move my head to face the TV. I listened to Martina McBride sing her ditty and slowly forced myself to find the energy to lift my head and reposition it to where I could see Sanjaya’s measly little face when he was told to go the hell away. And it was worth the exhausting effort it took. But as I began to do an inner celebratory dance, my conscience realized that poor annoying Sanjaya is just a kid. He’s little, and he shouldn’t be the cause of everyones’ ridicule. If he just wasn’t SO DAMN ANNOYING.

It’s like that Chicken Little Kevin kid from last season. Dude had a lisp. Don’t expect to win when your song choice is a rendition of Don McLean’s SchTARRY SchTarry Night and you look like a chicken. The elderly only like you because they are going blind and losing their hearing.

Anyhow. I feel a bit better today. Luckily for us, colds don’t last forever and annoying little contestants don’t win American Idol.


March 26, 2007 at 12:45 pm | Posted in Employment, Happy, sick | 9 Comments

Well, thanks to all of your wonderful thoughts being sent my way, I have two interviews scheduled with nationwide suit-wearing companies this week. One of the companies isn’t hiring, they just want to meet me because they think I’m cool. No, seriously. The other company is offering a plethora of positions and probably has as many candidates for the job so my hopes aren’t sky-high, but I’m pleased nonetheless.

Now if only I could get over being [half-dead] sick by my interview tomorrow morning, life would be perfect. I have spent the entire morning (with a few intermissions of watching The View and other meaningless TV) in the bathroom. I’m barely getting over the cold I’ve suffered through all week, and now everything else in my body has decided that it too would like to revolt. Thank you, body. I haven’t slept through a night in at least seven days and it seems that even NyQuil is no match for a restless Lauren.

But I don’t even care. I could lose a limb and would still make it to these interviews, because damnit, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and no sickness inducing bug is going to take my light away.

Happiness in comments. What makes your day?

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