Stalker sales

February 23, 2008 at 9:47 pm | Posted in silly pants | 6 Comments

I didn't take this picture Hilarious story.

A salesman just STALKED us at Bob’s Discount Furniture. We told this man that we were “just looking” a thousand times and yet he continued to follow us ten feet behind. He followed us into the couch section, into the Pit, into the dining room area.

My favorite part of the store escapade is when Sean went to use the restroom and the creepy salesman, who resembled Ron Moody’s character Fagin from Oliver!, stood two feet away as I tried to ignore his presence. As I stood there waiting for my hubby to come out of the john, the salesman (appropriately also named Ron) began to talk to me about the closest couch to my proximity.

Seriously, dude, LEAVE ME ALONE. I didn’t acknowledge him but instead turned a half circle so that my back faced him. There is only so many times I can blatantly tell this man to go away before he gets the hint.

So Sean and I finally walked into the bedroom section to possibly look at a matching set for our room. Of course Fagin followed and walked over to one of the dressers and began to pull out the drawers to show us the quality.

“Really.” I pleaded, ” We’ve been here before, we’ve heard all about the furniture, we are just looking.”

And he rebuttled, “Let me just show you the pine in this drawer, it’s built with….”

“NO!” I lost my cool. “WE’VE BEEN HERE BEFORE AND WE ARE JUST LOOKING, but thank you.”

And we walked away again, our backs clearly stating the end of the uninvited conversation.

(My second favorite part of the store experience was when I told Sean that I liked the Missionary style furniture and he unsuccessfully dared me to ask Fagin if they sold Doggy-style bed frames as well. Leave it to that boy to find a sense of humor while I am trying my best not to punch the furniture salesman.)

We stopped off at one more couch, with no sight of the man, and began to relax for three seconds as we discussed whether or not it would fit in our house. But as soon as we got the fifth word out, Ron Asshole appeared.

“Did you know this couch can be converted to a chaise?”

And with that, Sean and I stormed out. The stubborn Irish in me loudly proclaimed that THAT MAN IS A STALKER and DON’T EXPECT US TO BUY YOUR SHIT IF YOU HARASS US IN THE PROCESS as we walked toward the door. I wasn’t talking to the man, but you can bet I said it loud enough for him to hear me.


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  1. Coincidentally we’re going to do some furniture shopping today (big girl bed for Ciara). If we go to Bob’s we’ll be sure to have Stalker Ron show us around.

  2. Sounds like a call to the manager may be in order.

  3. I had a “Fagin” salesman at Raymour and Flanagan Store.. I wanted to ask him to show me the biggest ass convertable couch and put his annoying ass in it and walk out of the store.. LOL.. I like to shop alone so I can concentrate on what im buying.. So Note to Store managers.. pay the sales people a commission NOT to bother the customers lolllllllll..Maby you will have better luck

  4. You should have Maced him.

    The manager would probably come running out to see what the commotion was, see the salesman writhing on the floor, and say “Ron, have you been bothering the customers again?”

  5. I’m deaf. Next time, just pretend you’re deaf. Point to your ears and shrug your shoulders. Then…act like you don’t understand a word he’s saying. Grunt all responses.

    Even tho I can speak, I do it with all stoopid salespeople. Hehehehehe…

  6. I went to look at cars once, and the salesman was horribly all over us. We said “we’re just looking” and he left, and then when we had a question, he wouldn’t help us and said “I thought you were just looking!”

    We left and went elsewhere and DID buy a car, and got a perverse thrill in going back to the first dealership and yelling out the window “Look! We bought a car! and not here!” at the idiot and then peeling out of the parking lot.

    I know it’s juvenile, but it had to be done.

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